


Faith in Lies

by Queenofthebees



Series: Take me to church [1]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Faith of the Seven, Jon and Sansa know each other, Nun Sansa, as in she likes it, but Sansa's memories are messed up, but isn't prepared to explore iit...yet, unconscious praise kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:49:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24830350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queenofthebees/pseuds/Queenofthebees
Summary: Sinking to her knees before the maiden, she took a shuddering breath and closed her eyes."Oh maiden, help guide me away from sin," she whispered.She was a good girl. Truly a good girl, not his good girl. She wouldn't be tempted, she wouldn't!JonsaKinkWeek Day 1: Praise Kink,
Relationships: Jon Snow/Sansa Stark
Series: Take me to church [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1796077
Comments: 21
Kudos: 130
Collections: JonsaKinks





	Faith in Lies

She first met Jon on a Sunday, right before the eleven-o-clock service when she had been greeting worshipers at the doors of the sept and he had been at the outer wall, smoking a cigarette.

“Excuse me!” she called to him, giving an apologetic smile to the line as she moved towards him.

He glanced up, lips still around the cigarette, one brow raised at her approach.

“You can’t smoke there.”

Taking the cigarette out, he blinked at her before slowly looking around him and then shrugging. “Sorry, there weren’t any signs.”

Sansa huffed. “This is a place of worship.”

He smirked at her, holding her gaze as he took another slow drag of the damn thing. “Worship huh?” he commented, finally stubbing it out on the wall. He looked back up at her, leaning across the wall. “I’d worship you all day long sweetheart.”

Blushing, she took a step back, staring in disbelief at the insinuation. Right here, on holy ground. She swallowed thickly, ready to tell him she was sworn to chastity as the High Septon ordered of the nuns. But then he chuckled.

“Alas,” he commented, moving away from the wall and shrugging, stretching his palms out and up. “Vows, you know.”

“You can come in any time,” she responded slowly, trying to keep her courage. “The Seven forgive.”

“Do they?” he asked, sounding genuinely intrigued. Sansa nodded. He frowned then, leaning back on the wall with his chin in his hand. “So, why not just sin then?”

“What, so people should just steal and murder and…and…have _relations_? It doesn’t count if you’re not sorry!”

He barked out a laugh. “Are you seriously saying having a good fuck is as sinful as killing someone?”

“Sansa, dear, the service is starting!” the septon called out and Sansa mentally made a note to visit the prayer room and thank the gods for the rescue.

“Sansa, huh? Well, I’ll see you around, Sansa,” he called out to her retreating back. “I’m Jon.”

Sansa forced a polite smile and hoped she wouldn’t be seeing him around.

***

Unfortunately, it seemed that Jon had made it his mission to be there every Sunday morning.

So far, Sansa had managed to avoid another conversation with him but every time she felt the need to frown at his smoking, his gaze was already on her and his lips tilted into a smirk because he knew she would look and would disapprove. He seemed determined to get any reaction from her and to her frustration, it was working, no matter how small the reaction was.

“You really shouldn’t ruin the body the gods gave you,” she commented the one Sunday he had arrived earlier than usual, already there when she went to tidy up the plants at the door. As always, the smirk was there, the casual leaning over the wall as he watched her.

“You offering me to ruin yours instead?”

She swerved to face him, seething. “You’re disgusting!”

He held his hands up and seemed to have the decency to look apologetic. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”

She blinked, taken aback at the admission and for a moment she wasn’t sure what she should say or do. Jon cleared his throat, running a hand across his beard.

“I’ve been thinking,” he said slowly, looking up at the clock tower at the top of the sept. “About what you said when I first came here.”

“You can be forgiven,” she assured him, her anger disappearing. He was willing to seek help and the Septon always said to be kind to those who wanted to cleanse themselves.

A bark of a laugh again, just like the first time. “I’m good.”

He chuckled to himself for a moment as Sansa frowned in confusion. Clearing his throat, he continued.

“Why do you have to stay chaste?”

“That’s not your concern.”

Turning, she stalked towards the entrance, wishing her cheeks weren’t so prone to blushing at the sheer mention of sex.

“I get not murdering people and not stealing. But why is sex bad?” he shouted out. Sansa paused, forcing herself to take a deep breath before she whirled around to face him and found herself storming towards him.

“Who are you to question the ways of the faith?” she hissed. Jon shrugged.

“Curious,” he commented lightly. “Why is sex bad? And specifically, why is a woman having sex so bad? Why is _your_ sexual experiences a sin but I can fuck whoever I want without consequence? Do _I_ have to be forgiven for not being a virgin before marriage or fucking someone before the faith tells me who to sacrifice my virtue to? What’s the difference?”

“I…It’s not…” She felt herself scowling, her fists clenching at her sides like they did when she felt cornered. “It’s what the faith says.”

“Well I don’t think it has a place now, does it?” he countered. “Why should a woman feel guilty for having pleasure? For exploring her options?”

“Maybe you’re just trying to seduce me by making me question my faith,” she growled, tilting her chin as she felt a new bravery overcome her. Jon stood to his full height, that smirk back.

“Finally worked it out, did you?”

She felt her jaw drop, unsure how to react. Jon chuckled.

“Don’t worry, I know it won’t happen,” he said lightly, taking another cigarette out of his shirt pocket. “You’re a good girl.”

Heat flushed through her. Not at the words but the way he said them, a silken purr that echoed in her bones. She felt as though her knees would buckle as his eyes meet hers and she forced herself to keep his gaze, to stand tall and defiant.

“I am,” she stated far more confidently than she felt. “I am a daughter of the seven.”

“Can’t blame me for trying,” he commented, still smirking around his cigarette.

She felt herself frowning at the thing. And for some reason, the tease came easily. “Quit those and you might have a better chance at succeeding.”

He quirked a brow, taking the cigarette from his mouth. Her breath hitched as his eyes pinned on hers and he stubbed it out, without looking away once, without blinking.

“I’ll take that bet,” he murmured gently and Sansa wondered what she had let herself into.

***

 _“You’re a good girl._ ”

Tossing in bed, Sansa let out a huff. No matter how much she tried, she couldn’t stop those words, the way he had said them, from whirling around in her head.

She had been in the Sept for almost a year now, since she was seventeen. She couldn’t’ remember what had happened, but she had been told her parents and older brother were killed in an accident and Petyr, her mother’s friend, had brought her here. The sept was a safe space, somewhere she didn’t have to think about what had happened. She had never thought to question the teachings because she was so grateful to have somewhere to be safe.

_“Why is sex bad? And specifically, why is a woman having sex so bad?”_

The sept had strict rules about chastity. Only her husband, or the man the sept chose, should be blessed with her virtue. That was the price to protect her soul. Or so Petyr had said to her. And she had been so scared of going to the seven hells, she had promised to be chaste. She hadn’t once questioned it.

But now…now she wondered why her body would react like that to such words, the husky tone Jon spoke with. The way it made her feel hot, feel the need to press her thighs together and how she really wanted to hear them again. Why would she have such a reaction if it was wrong?

_“Why should a woman feel guilty for having pleasure? For exploring her options?”_

Her teeth were already biting into her lip as she closed her eyes tight, hoping to squeeze out these conflicting feelings that were swirling in her stomach like butterflies. Why was she thinking about his voice whispering praise in her ear? Why did she _want_ him to?

It was a test, she determined. And she knew what she had to do.

Her heart felt as though it would burst by the time she had reached the prayer room.

Fingers shaking, she tugged at the collar of her dress, desperate for some of the heat to escape her, desperate for air as her chest tightened with this strange and awfully wonderful feeling. She was desperate. Desperate, desperate, desperate!

Sinking to her knees before the maiden, she took a shuddering breath and closed her eyes.

"Oh maiden, help guide me away from sin," she whispered.

She was a good girl. Truly a good girl, not _his_ good girl. She wouldn't be tempted, she wouldn't!

***

The next Sunday he was there and no cigarette was in sight.

“How’s my chances now?” he teased; arms folded beneath his chest as he watched her. Sansa scoffed.

“Still sworn to chastity, sorry.”

“Mmm…they must be so proud of you here for being such a good girl.”

She gasped, the watering can slipping from her hands. Grateful that her knees hadn’t buckled and giving her some saving grace, she quickly bent to retrieve it and willed her cheeks to stop burning.

“I am a good girl,” she said, hoping to disarm the effect those words had if she faced it head on. She forced herself to face him. “I will remain a maid. Go and seduce someone else.”

“I don’t want anyone else, I want you. I’ve always wanted you.”

Halfway up the steps, she paused and slowly turned her head again. “What?”

“You don’t remember me?” he asked. “Jon Snow? Robb’s best friend?”

“Robb…my brother?”

“You really don’t remember anything?”

She shook her head slowly and found herself walking towards him.

“I was your first kiss.”

“What?” she commented before she shook her head again. “No…I’ve…I’ve never been kissed I…”

“It was Halloween. Theon had made a prank like the prick he was. And you’d gotten spooked and come running inside, straight into my arms. And begged me to save you. So, I went out there and punched him in his dumb Jason thirteenth costume and switched the lights on. When I came back, you threw your arms around my neck and kissed me. I kissed you back because I… I loved you. You said it was your first kiss…”

“I don’t remember,” she whispered sadly, feeling awful for the admission. It sounded like it had meant a lot to him. It must have meant a lot to her too, to give something so precious. “Was I your first kiss?”

“No,” he sighed regretfully. “I never thought we’d be a thing.”

“How did you find me? Everything before I came here is a blur…”

“I’ve been looking non stop since the day your parents and Robb were found dead and you gone from your room.”

“That’s…they died in a car accident…”

Jon frowned. “They were shot, in your home.”

“Sansa!”

The Septon was at the door, giving them a puzzled look. Sansa stepped away from Jon.

“I have to go.”

Hurrying after the septon, she forced a smile and found her place at the front of the alter with her sisters. But as the hymms began, she found herself unable to do anything but mouth the words.

Why had Petyr told her something different? Why had he lied to her?

And what else had he lied about?


End file.
